Bullshit & Subs

Today was, to borrow from Kevin Hart, somethin' else.

As if work wasn't stressful enough, some bullshit decides to make an impromptu visit.

Although, I do have to say, work wasn't as bad. I work for a great school that specializes in the Entertainment and Media industries, and I was able to help some great future students get started with pursuing their dreams in the Music industry. So while it was stressful (Blame the people I work with. Ugh.), it was still pretty awesome.

Every once in a while, I check my FB at work when the lines are dead or I have a quick sec. I see I have three messages. One from a great friend who I keep up with from time to time (college Mickey D's Buddy!).

Another from someone (female, we'll call her T) who I've recently caught up with. She's been asking me recently about the school I work for (campus program; I deal with online), trying to enroll within the next year. So a message from her is not out of the ordinary.

It was that third message that caught me off guard.

It was a message from that same homegirl's ex boyfriend. EX being the key component.

A little background. I met the girl first during orientation for my college. One of the only girls I could do more than tolerate. Not a lot of my friends knew about her. She wasn't one to drink or party, something that was always the plan living in Tallahassee. When we hung out, it was always like a movie, or seeing each other every once in a while at the mall or something. She was cool, someone different. Living in Tallahassee, everyone always went out or was drinking. Her being someone who didn't do that (a RARITY), it was nice to get to know her in a way that I was used to gaining friends. Natural conversation, not meeting in a loud club or bumpin' house party surrounded by alcohol.

At the end of the first year, she met this dude and they ended up becoming a couple. He was cool. No friction between us. Never really call it a friendship or anything like that, but it was cool. Everything was everything. They broke up. It was a clean one.That's not to say they didn't have problems. Plus, being girls, she was always telling me shit about him and things that would frustrate her about him, and some things I'm sure that he wouldn't like me to know. Some "things he's into", if you will.

But whatever. I charged that to the game. I don't speak to him. I rarely speak to her. It's information I know. We move on.

Around the city, I would see him whenever I went out, pushin' up on chicks. Say "Hey what's good?". Very surface level. I literally haven't spoken to him since 2007.

I open his message and it is a rant about how I need to stop talkin' to T, how she can get in to the school without me. He didn't know why we still spoke. How I got no business with her and I should leave her alone.

HUH?!

I messaged back and said ".........um, what?" I clearly didn't understand what he was talking about. He said that he didn't appreciate me speaking to her, and he heard that I was bad mouthin' his relationship when they were together. He had said he heard it from another friend (Tallahassee is SUPER small). I told him that wasn't the case, and that he needed to get his facts straight. Then he started to (try) to come for me, saying that I was always a hater, and I never approved of his relationship with T. Other shit that lame dudes say when they are on some dumb shit.

HUH???? This is a dude who I never spoke to! I can count on one hand how many meaningful conversations I've had with him.

I messaged her (we ain't friends on FB) and was like "Yo, what's good with your boy, dude?" She responded with she doesn't know what happened, why he's trippin', she hasn't spoken with him in years, blah, blah, blah. I asked how he knew we had been talking about her getting in to school if she hadn't spoken with him in years.

I have yet to get a response.

Like....where the fuck is this coming from?

I told him to mind his business, to leave me alone, and have a nice bum ass life.

I messaged T and told her to not speak with me until she handled that. I also told her I'm completely willing to help her with whatever she needs as far as the school goes, but I won't help her if it brings drama to my door.

Now T. Girl.

Don't come to me talking about you haven't spoken to him when he knows what you and I have been discussing. Just be honest. Like I said, I'll help you. But girl, keep that bullshit far FAR away from me.

Now to you, THIS NIGGA.

Do not come for me. You're nowhere near me. You live in Texas. Why are you kerfuffled about what's goin' on between two people in northern and central Florida?

Also, I know FAR more than you think. Ya girl opened the floodgates, and I know whatcha like, bruh.

I don't know you, I have no ill will towards you. But when you come around this way with the bullshit, please remember I KNOW WHAT YOU LIKE. She told me. Yeah. So calm that shit down, dude.

Also, like most people with a twitter, you air out frustrations. Whatever.

3 different people hit me with the good DM talkin' about "Yo, you talkin about me?"

THREE. DIFFERENT. PEOPLE.

If you don't know what I'm talking about, mind your GD business because I'm not gonna explain it to you. If its about you, trust me. You'll know.

I was frustrated. I tweeted. It's really not as deep as you try to make it.

Like calm down yo. Jeez. All up in my tweets and shit.

Don't you have shit to do? Responsibilities? Jobs?

Let me vent! It's twitter! Dang!

If you don't know, either get the facts, or just laugh at my tweets.

Oh, also, feel free to disregard them as well. That is another option you have.

Whew. What a day. At least I had a good day at work, which has become few and far between as of late.

And my boy Dan is cancer free!! The prayers have been answered, and it's gone. God's Good, y'all.

Until next time.....


CuCu

Purge.

I Have Shit On My Chest.

Here we go.

Number 1: Blessings.

I want to start off with something positive. I had a pretty good 2012. It wasn't everything I had hoped for, but I am happy that I learned and gained so much. I got a great job with an amazing company and have been able to be blessed beyond measure. I can buy things for myself and those I love, and be around for fun things and not be completely.....well lame. LoL.

I've learned a lot about myself. I'm stronger than I had thought, and I was able to navigate some situations that I originally thought I wouldn't be able to.

Yay Me.

I thank God for guiding me thru this year, taking care of all of my loved ones, and not only pouring blessings on me, but them as well.

Good Looks, Jesus. I look forward to what you have in store for me in 2013.

Number 2: Mind Your Own

What will always piss me off is people who are nosy. I keep shit real close to the chest. I reveal only what I wish.

MIND YOUR FUCKING BUSINESS. If I want you to know something, you will. If I don't let you in on something specific, realize that there is a reason why. If anything, tell yourself that I'm protecting you from something that could possibly harm you. Whatever you need to tell yourself to leave the subject THE ENTIRE FUCK ALONE.

And, by the way, you asking me over and over again is not got to make me give in and just tell you.

If I don't want you to know, you won't.

DEAL.

I'm careful who I let know what about me, my life, and my thoughts. I never want to give out too much info for someone else to use on me at will. What's the point of giving someone a loaded gun?

Now I don't have some mind-blowing, extraordinary secret. I'm (for the most part) pretty normal. Another reason for people to not go so Sherlock Holmes on my ass. But I do have things that I'd rather leave in the hands of someone I know who won't try to screw me over at some point, or at least someone who isn't juvenile enough to use it against me just because we had a disagreement about something.

I don't know.

At the end of the day, people wanting to know who I am have to be masterful at how they approach a convo with me, or be really really REALLY patient with me.

Secrets don't make friends. But they keep people intrigued, and save my ass from being grass.

Number 3: Indecisive People

I've never understood what gives people the idea that coming in and out of your life is not only allowed, but something that can be done at the drop of the dime.

In my (much) younger (read: dumber) days, I let people fuck up, "leave", and then "come back" like nothing ever happened, much to the frustration of all those that truly care for me most. And it left me completely fucked. 

Now, I'm wiser (refuse to say "older", LoL), and I really try to see things and situations for what they are and not necessarily for what I wish them to be. If it looks like shit, and smells like shit, I'm not gonna call that fertilizer that can help my future plants grow.

It's shit, and I don't want it anywhere near me.

If you want to leave, talk shit, that's fine. Do You, Boo. But best believe once you leave, you're fucking out. No reentry in this motherfucker. So choose wisely. I don't have time for people to come and go as they please. I've had people (My Best Friend/Sister/Wife) stick thru thick and thin, even when I fucked up. So I know that it's possible and that I'm not completely crazy and wrong. So if you want to stay, you can.

If you don't, BYE. I'm not bothered. 

Number 4: Honesty

There was a point in my life where honesty scared me. It was the way I was raised. Even if it was as clear as day, it wasn't talked about.

Now that I've grown up, I've come to kind of crave it. Crave's a bad word.

REQUIRE. Better.

Listen, being honest is not for the faint of heart. But it's the best way to live. Be honest. You pissed? Say when and why. You don't like someone? Let 'em know before it gets anywhere. Someone asks you how they look and they look like a hot ass muthafuckin mess? Let em know before everyone sees them as the person who has no one that cares for them.

It helps everyone!

You may get your feelings hurt. You may hurt others. But never permanently. Eventually, the person who you're honest with will have to respect and appreciate the fact that you didn't lie. We all learn eventually from honesty. The key to it is that the moment the person you're honest with appreciates you truthfulness may not be witnessed by you. Just trust and believe that at some point the person will, however silent and fleeting the moment will be, thank you for your realness.

Trust me. I'm a Professional.

Number 5: Girly Moments

Ask all of my friends. I may look girly, but I'm not completely girly. 

Now don't misunderstand. I love heels and dresses and lipstick and bows and all that shit. 

But on my days off, I make sure and watch at least 2 hours of SportsCenter. 

First Take is MY. SHIT. Steven A. Smith is my uncle I know it.

I love sports documentaries. I organize my errands and shopping around football games. I'd much rather get tickets to a game than go out on a dinner date.

I'm so serious.

Once, one of my really good friends and his cousin came to my house to have dinner with me, my sister, and my mother. They thought it was gonna be a whole sit around the table deal. The 3 of us ladies copped a squat in front of the tv, watched SportsCenter, and had a heated (not really. We're Puerto Rican, so everything sounds like an argument) debate about football for the entire meal. The two guests (both male) were in shock.

I LOOK girly. Not completely.

I say that to say this: when REAL girly moments decide to manifest, it scares me. LoL.

I don't like being too vulnerable and girly. It's nice to know that I can still activate that when appropriate, but it's something so unfamiliar to me that when I do have those moments, it freaks me out, for lack of a better term. 

Think of it like a Hulk. It's badass, but hard to control.

Lately, they've been making frequent appearances (i.e. previous posts). 

I hate that shit yo. Forreal.

But I'm gonna try to put a leash on it and figure it out so it can fit the person I am. Not trying to freak ol' dude out. LoL

For real though, I'm pretty laid back. I'm a good mix of both. Don't take a lot of shit seriously. Easy going. As long as you're upfront, laid back, and funny, you'll rarely get into a tiff with me. 

Play your video games. Hang out with your boys.

But don't be pissed off if you see me at the bar with my people screaming at the TV at a pick 6.

::shrugs::

Welp. That's enough for now. It's after 1am, and my iTunes got me vibin in my PJs.

CuCu